Truly Disappointed in Myself this Week: 232 lbs!

So, I wanted 2021 to be a stellar year for just about everything in my life. From being more productive to reaching my goal weight. And although I am finally getting some semblance of structure, it’s still an uphill battle. And it doesn’t help that I went back up to over 230 pounds!

It’s kind of hard to express authority as a health and fitness blogger if you can’t even meet your own goals.

However, I’m fairly sure a lot of us gained weight over this past week, especially if you’re a stress eater. The events over the last few days are quite unnerving.

And, this isn’t at all helpful for beating my son in weight loss this month.

Why the Increase in Mass?

First of all, I’m a stress eater. And when I start to feel anxious or extremely nervous, I tend to binge on just about anything I can find. After a while, it starts to add up.

It wasn’t just the events of January 6th on Capitol Hill that I found disturbing. I’ve also had a house full of quarantining people for the past month.

I probably wouldn’t be so stressed if I went out more by myself. The problem is, I have nowhere to go. Masks, social distancing, closures, all the things I like to do are also usually group activities.

I would love to get to a point where one of my projects pays me enough to warrant renting an office space downtown. There are even times when I seriously consider getting a part-time job just so I can get out of the house.

I don’t need the money…I just need to escape!

How I’m Getting Back on Track

OK, so I weighed in at 232 pounds this morning. I have just over three weeks to go to lose more than the boy. And from what I’ve seen and heard, he’s not doing all that well on his diet either.

I need to take advantage of his lack of effort. He thinks I am too old to keep up and is being lax in his effort.

I’ve been able to drop half a pound per day by actually putting in the effort. This was back when I was eating Progresso soup for lunch and dinner.

Perhaps I should go back to that diet. After all, I can’t argue with the results. The first 60 pounds of weight loss all centered around soups, which is fine to me.

I love Progresso soups, anyway.

According to the CDC, the average person who successfully keeps off the weight can lose up to two pounds per week. For me, it’s closer to three just by not overeating.

This Week’s Workout Routine

OK, I am going to use the Bodyblade twice a day until my kids get out of my living room. I can do this from my bedroom since I have plenty of space and privacy in there.

Besides, I need some calorie-burn data for the articles I am writing in the near future.

I’m also going to do something different at 10 am and 3:45 pm, when my workout alarms go off on my phone. I picked up a new, 12-sided exercise die from Five Below a couple of weeks ago.

Each side of the die has a different exercise and a number of reps. For example, if I roll the die, there’s a chance it’ll come up with something like “15 Push Ups.”

The plan is to roll the die three times while doing each of the exercises it shows. Then, I’m adding at least 7 reps of the ab roller. This is because I would still like to beat my personal record of 10 reps at the end of the month.

It sounds like a fun plan. Now, I just need to commit. This is something I’m still having an issue with, though. Again, every time the workout alarm goes off, I’m in the middle of doing client work or blogging.

And because I’m trying to make 2021 a stellar year for content, I skip the alarm and continue working.

I’m still truly excited about where things are going so far. In fact, one of my blogs has grown exponentially in the last month. But, it’s not conducive to increasing physical activity.

I can’t really lose the weight if I’m not doing anything to lose it.

Gotta Keep them Calories in the Green!

I still need to find a way to convince myself that it’s vital to keep the calories in the green in MyFitnessPal. I just can’t seem to get into the mindset I had when I weighed 300+ pounds.

It’s almost like a part of me is just saying, “eh, we’re close enough.” 

And that’s how I’ve lived a large portion of my life. Doing the minimum to get “close enough” to success without actually pushing myself over the top. 

Well, outside of freelance writing, anyway. And even then, I am nowhere near where I could be if I just put more effort into what I’m doing.

This week, I am going to try to muster up the same conviction and passion for keeping the calories green as I do for writing.

It Helps for Authority and Expertise

As I mentioned above, it’s difficult to express myself as an expert if I can’t manage to control my habits and lose the last of the weight. And part of improving this blog centers around expertise.

“Thanks, Google.” he said dripping with sarcasm.

It’s all about Expertise, Authority, and Trustworthiness. None of which this blog is really known for at the moment.

The goal this year is to get this blog to where it was at the beginning of 2019. And I can’t very well do that unless I can demonstrate I know what the hell I’m talking about.

Sure, I can quote all kinds of expert advice, show off all sorts of scientific evidence, and share a bit of my success. But, that pales in comparison to actually showing the results of what I’ve learned.

The only thing I’m demonstrating right now is how difficult it is for someone who suffers from deep depression to lose weight.

So, what I’m going to do is pop my head out of my ass and get the ball rolling.

It Gives Me Content

One of my goals is to make sure I can hit 1 million words written this year. And putting more effort into losing weight helps me come up with new ideas for blog posts and perhaps even a YouTube video or two.

In fact, that’s why I created this blog in the first place…to help me stay motivated and focused. It seems the more often I blog, the more intent I have to succeed.

Not to mention that I love writing reviews on various products. It gives me a chance to try new things and find what works to lose weight and be more healthy in general.

Here’s to a Productive Week…Hopefully

According to my own personal records, I should be able to reach 229.5 pounds by next week. That’s assuming I lose 0.5 pounds per day over seven days, which is possible. I’ve done it several times before.

So, that is the goal. I’m going to hit 229 pounds by next Friday morning. And I’m going to do it without starvation diets or burning myself out on a treadmill.

I just need to keep in mind that I’m doing it for a blog post about how I lost “X” amount of pounds in seven days.


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Michael Brockbank

Since 2015, Michael has put in the effort to lose more than 80 pounds by gamifying fitness and eating proper portion sizes. He conducts extensive research into various health and fitness products to provide the best answers possible according to his own experience and knowledge.

2 thoughts on “Truly Disappointed in Myself this Week: 232 lbs!

  • January 8, 2021 at 6:40 pm

    Go for it, Michael! ROLL THEM DICE!!!

    Actually, come to think of it, rolling the dice and doing the exercise might be a fun idea for quick daily videos on your Instagram.


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