Since I started this latest challenge of getting fit by 50, my entire world has come crashing down in a spectacular fashion. Well, I can’t say the “whole world,” but much of it is a pile of rubble at the moment.
I don’t want to go into too much detail, but I recently lost my last client to AI and can no longer afford to keep the house. That’s just part of the stress, as we’re also facing a variety of health challenges and hospital visits.
Needless to say, my stress has been dialed to unbelievable levels, and I’ve been walking around with a tension headache for months. As a result, I’ve been eating extremely poorly without really getting in any form of exercise.
The shining light at the end of this long, dark tunnel is the fact that I passed my finals with blazing colors. I’m still a 4.0 undergrad and won a $4000 scholarship for school next fall. So, at least I have that going for me. Combined with my grant, I should be able to attend fall and spring semesters without loans or out-of-pocket cash.
What Does That Mean for Fit By 50?
I had a lot of great plans and ideas regarding this latest challenge. This is what happens when your stress gets you near a breaking point…you stop caring about a lot of things your mind sets aside as trivial.
I spent the last week trying to find positive things to get me out of this funk, and I think I found inspiration to do so. The trick is to keep the positivity up regardless of what happens. There are a lot of variables that are up in the air at the moment.
For instance, I have no idea where I’ll be living on my birthday.
Still, I have hope and am starting to get into a more positive headspace about the future. Sure, things have upended at the moment. But that doesn’t mean it’s all going to be bad. Change of this magnitude could be one of the most beneficial things in life. It really depends on how I roll with it.
Do I let it consume me and drive a severe depression? Or, do I view it as an adventure, a new chapter in my book of life?
Physical Health
I highly doubt I’ll have enough time to get to the level of fitness I would like by the time I turn 50. In reality, I have about two months. I might be able to get back down to the 220s by then, and it really depends on how committed I am for the duration.
Back to the Point System
I believe I was on the right track with the point system I created for the spreadsheet. By focusing on keeping the differences green every day, it means that I dialed up the physical activity.
Keep in mind that I’m not just looking to lose weight. I want to be more athletic. Well, at least in better physical condition than I am now. I would like to walk up three flights of stairs without gasping for air. Or carry two 5-gallon water jugs into the house without wheezing.
Anyway, I am going to work on keeping the point differences green every day. And that’s going to depend on exercising, walking, and eating healthier all around. My cholesterol is scary high, and I need to start working on reducing it before they put me on medication.
Getting Back to the Gym
I really miss going to the gym. In fact, my therapist was telling me that I should get back to it, as exercise can help reduce my stress levels. I laughed and told him that I’ve written several blog posts about how therapists would rather treat depression with exercise than medication.
To help me get back into the habit of going to the gym, I’m going to restrict my social media scrolling and watching random videos on YouTube after getting up. I end up chewing up too much time in the mornings, as I wind up going down some weird rabbit holes. It’s a bad habit that I got into and need to shake if I want to improve my life overall.
Doomscrolling adds to the stress, especially given the political climate at the moment. I need to focus more on keeping myself healthy and safe in the mornings.
Getting Back to Net 600
Although I hate what Under Armour has done to MyFitnessPal, it’s still a decent tool for keeping track of what I consume and how much I burn. However, I am currently looking for a replacement app that connects with Fitbit data. So if you know of a good one outside of Apple, let me know in the comments.
Anyway, I’m going to get back to my Net 600 Calorie Diet. I would love to see what happens if I can maintain it over the long haul. As long as I keep myself active like I want, it should be no problem to maintain.
So, if I want those extra servings of Red Vines, I’d better get off my ass and walk or something to work myself into a sweat.
Mental Health
Perhaps the most important facet of losing weight and improving fitness is your mental health. Without your mind being in the game, you’ll find success to be damn near impossible.
Right now, my mental health is improving, but I still struggle as I try to put things back together. Nonetheless, I am committed to doing what I can to improve my mood and general outlook on life. Things are a bit more chaotic right now than normal, but that doesn’t mean I should give up and roll over. I still have a lot of plans I’d like to see through.
Finding Moments of Zen
According to everyone I know, including the therapist, I need to start finding regular moments of Zen. This also means taking full days off and relaxing in some fashion. Reading a book, playing a game or two, or even a nice relaxing bike ride through the Arsenal is far better than sitting here dwelling on the negative things in life.
In other words, I need to start securing time for just me. It’s not selfish to explore self-care, and it’s increasingly vital to do so as you get older. This is especially true when you see that men over 50 with moderate to high levels of stress have about a 50% higher mortality rate than men with low stress.
So, perhaps I’ll need to work on my personal moments of Zen before my body decides to throw in the towel.
Doubling Down On Content Creation
Believe it or not, content creation is great for helping me relax. Whether I am writing a book, blogging, or creating a new video, I am far less stressed when doing something creative. And there is a chance I could make an extra buck or two from the process.
As long as I am not trying to view it as a way to make money and go back to being a creator because of the joy it brings me, my stress melts away during those hours. That’s especially true when it comes to this particular blog or MichaelBrockbank.com, as they are more of an online journal of sorts than anything.
Would I like to make enough money from the content to replace a full-time income? Absolutely. But creating for the sake of helping others or exploring my imagination is extremely helpful to my mental state.
Still Looking for a Job, Though
Although I would love nothing more than to get paid a livable wage for creating content, I’m also realistic. And since not being able to pay all of my bills is part of my stress level, continuing to look for a paying job is a virtual requirement.
The plan is to apply to several jobs per day and then spend some time working on creating various forms of content. I have a few part-time prospects that will allow me to continue going to school full-time in the fall, and any one of them will work to help me pay the bills.
It’s just a bit sad that I have to semi-retire from freelance writing. Most of my experience is in copywriting and business development. Thanks to the proliferation of AI, my specific skill set is obsolete. So, I am moving on and developing other marketable skills.
I’ll still accept writing jobs should someone reach out. However, I am no longer specifically looking for freelance clients. This does a fair amount of damage to my mental state, as I spent the last 14 years working on being a Class A writer. Yet, I feel I might do relatively well in a variety of other industries and positions. I have a knack for adapting quickly, and I’m not overly worried about finding a job somewhere.
What Can I Do in 59 Days?
As I said, I doubt I’ll hit my fitness goals by my birthday. The last few weeks have really sucked the wind out of my sails and thrown my life for a loop. But I’m still in it to win it.
I can either wallow in self-pity and over-indulge in sugar and Taco Bell. Or, I can dust myself off and adapt. I prefer to do the latter. Yes, my life is no longer following a specific path. That doesn’t mean it will be any worse than where I was going. It just means it’s going to be different.
So, let’s see if I can make something out of this challenge for the next two months. I may not hit my goal weight, but I’ll still be better off than I was when the year began.
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Congrats on keeping up with school and acing those classes. Keep it up.
Now we just gotta work on all the other shit =)
See ya tonight, buddy
Right? And a lot of other shit it is. lol